Flashes Fizzle Against Dolphins

Tallahassee Democract (Tallahassee, FL) – The Hillard Flashes fell to the Southwood Dolphins 97-90 in Week 1 of NFFL action.  The Flashes owner was irate following the loss and blamed the defeat on the North Florida Seersuckers.  “I wasn’t sure who to start at QB this week. I asked the owner of the ‘Seers who said he’d give the nod to Matt Ryan over Colt McCoy. I listened to him and we lost!” said Flashes owner Becky Bonfanti while addressing the press at St. John’s Seafood.

The Mootown Marauders opened their season with a win over the Golden Eagles 91-73 and it appears Kirsten “Gucci” Matthis’ decision to hire Geoff Gonzalez as her General Manager is paying off. “I was getting a mani/pedi and heard we won. I’m really excited we did because it means I can buy more shoes,” said Matthis. For the Eagles the loss was a hard way to open the 2011 Season after losing last season’s title game. “We lost NFFL Cup V. I get it. How many times is that going to be mentioned this year,” said a distraught Criss.

In an early season match-up between two Lombardi Division foes the Slippery Rock Torfeasors on the road toppled the Tallahassee Terrors 85-80.  “Winning is about focus and we lacked that today. We’ll go back, look at the film and focus on the process,” said Terrors’ head coach Nick Saban. The Tortfeasors will face the Dolphins in Week 2 while the Terrors will try and rebound againt the Marauders.

Energy Blaster 3000 NFFL Scoreboard

Nimrods 125
Seersuckers 111

All Stars 82
Cornish Hens 124

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