Hens Like Butter on a Roll

Jefferson County Journal (Monticello, FL) -The Monticello Cornish Hens emasculated the Lamont All Stars 107-70 before a packed house at Chicken Delite Field.  The win keeps the Hens 1/2 a game behind the 1st place Miccosukee Nimrods. “With four weeks left in the regular season each one we get is a really big deal.  In fact, this wins is more exciting than playing with my kitchen set,” said Hens Defensive Coordinator Morgan “3-4” McNeill.  In the other locker room a distraught Kirk “Gerrymander” Reams openly wept.  “Losing to the Hens is bad, but losing to them twice in a season is unacceptable,”
Reams wailed as he sipped a skinny latte.

In a match-up between top teams in the Lombardi Division the Mootown Marauders destroyed the suddenly reeling Seersuckers 131-65. “I’m not sure what happened out there.  It was like Antitem,” said a calm, collected and bourbon fueled ‘Seers owner Mike “Four Roses” Bonfanti.  The win puts the Marauders within striking distance of 1st place, a position no one thought possible at the beginning of the season.

The Hilliard Flashes continued to stumble as they fell to the Southwood Dolphins 108-79.  The loss is the 4th straight for the Flashes who find themselves mired in last place.  “I’m not sure what’s going on.  Maybe having my entire roster filled with Jaguars players was a bad thing? Who cares! Go ‘Jags!” said Flashes owner Becky “Top-O-The-Pyramid” Bonfanti.

Energy Blaster 3000 NFFL Scoreboard

Nimrods 84
Terrors 73

Eagles 102
Tortfeasors 87

Subway Fresh Take NFFL Standings

LOMBARDI DIVISION
TEAM W L T PCT GB
North Florida Seersuckers 6 3 0 .667
Mootown Marauders 5 4 0 .556 1
Slippery Rock Tortfeasors 5 4 0 .556 1
Golden Eagles 4 4 1 .500 1.5
Tallahassee Nitro Terrors 2 6 1 .278 3.5
TAGLIABUE DIVISION
TEAM W L T PCT GB
Miccosukee Nimrods 6 3 0 .667
Monticello Cornish Hens 5 3 1 .611 0.5
Southwood Dolphins 5 4 0 .556 1
Lamont All Stars 3 5 1 .389 2.5
Hilliard Flashes 2 7 0 .222 4

 

 

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