‘Seers Roll Over Nimrods

North Florida Seersuckers

Jefferson County Journal (Monticello, FL) – The North Florida Seersuckers completed their season sweep of the Miccosukee Nimrods as they defeated the ‘Rods 138-103 before a capacity crowd at Tupelo’s Bakery Field.  The ‘Seers improved to 5-4 with the victory and now occupy second place in the SEC-like Lombardi Division.  “Winning a Lombardi Division game is not something that’s guaranteed. Every week is a struggle, but we focused on process and it yielded some good results” said the ‘Seers defensive coordinator Les Miles.  The Miccosukee Nimrods find themselves at 3-6 and in fourth place with four games to play. “I’m tired of losing. I’ve given Bennett all the resources he needs to succeed and it hasn’t happened. I’m thinking of making Stubby our GM,” said a visibly distraught Joey “Pierogi” Zollner.  The ‘Rods will look to straighten out their season next week as they face the hated Golden Eagles.

In a match-up of the top teams of the Tagliabue Division the New Caanan Chrebets rolled over a lifeless Lamont All Stars squad 93-68.  “T-Dub had a great game plan and it showed. He sees the field so well, and I think all of our success can be attributed to his innovative use of the binky, Bumbo, and cuddly bunny,” said Chrebets Director of Player Personnel Chris “I Ate All The Food” Christie.  For the Lamont All Starts the outcome of the game was disappointing. “I’ve been busy running a county and hunting deer. How much can one man do?” asked Kirk “Country Boy” Reams as he walked into Chicken Delight for a late night snack.

The Southwood Dolphins defeated the Mootown Marauders 115-101 and moved up to second in the Tagliabue Division.  “The Tagliabue is full of ACC speed, and it showed today. Mootown had no answer for our plays and the fact the refs were in our back pocket,” said Dolphins’ Head Coach Troy “Iron Fists” Rubin.  Meanwhile the Marauders have all but given up on the season. “We’re 2-7 and it looks like we may miss the playoffs. But who cares? It’s just more time to shop!” said Marauders spokeswoman Joan “Plastic Face” Rivers.


Flashes 60
Cornish Hens 114

Eagles 84
Tortfeasors 91


Slippery Rock Tortfeasors 8 1 0 .889
North Florida Seersuckers 5 4 0 .556 3
Golden Eagles 4 5 0 .444 4
Miccosukee Nimrods 3 6 0 .333 5
Mootown Marauders 2 7 0 .222 5
New Canaan Chrebets 6 2 1 .722
Southwood Dolphins 5 4 1.5 .556 1
Monticello Cornish Hens 5 4 0 .556 1.5
Lamont All Stars 4 4 1 .500 2
Hilliard Flashes 2 7 0 .222 4.5


One response to “‘Seers Roll Over Nimrods

  1. You guys just wait, T-Dub is saving the Lamb Swing & Monkey Sheets offense for the playoffs. You guys won’t know what hit you.

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